Character Profile: Numer

Hey, it’s time to formally introduce the players in this crazy novel! I’ll be making these posts every few days until I’ve gone through all the primary characters; this will actually go on past the publication date.

The main character of the novel Slubes is Numer: a slube, 23 years old (average lifespan of a slube is 80 years). A few years ago he moved to the village of Nottle for a quiet life. So much for that. He has a nervous disposition exacerbated by his own self-doubts. I guess he has a strong heart, though, since he goes on the insane escapade of Slubes in order to help his new friends. In fact, his heart probably overpowered his mind to get him to do it.

He’s introduced in the novel via a dream, because he’s sleeping. Past noon. Which is what puts him on the path to being the happenstance hero. Could anyone else have taken his place? Well, Nottle is a quiet town—there probably isn’t anyone else who could take his place, but even if they did, he probably wouldn’t let them. He’s got his reasons. His glaringly obvious reasons. (At least obvious when you read the book!)

And now an excerpt starring Numer:

Numer looked high and low, left and right, inside the market, and everywhere else. He found nothing and was ready to go back. Then he saw something twinkle in a tree next to his house: a crystal!

Numer tried to think of how he could reach that shard. First, he tried climbing the tree. His clumsy climbing caused him to slide back down whenever he got any height.

Okay, a better idea. Numer dashed straight for the tree. He pounded the Mallet Blaster onto the ground in order to fling himself up into the tree.

The mallet sank into the ground like it was peanut butter and lost its force. Numer got no air. Instead he got dirt—he flopped onto the ground face-first not two feet away.

Numer spat out some grass and lifted himself up, brushing off the dirt. Maybe he should just go back to bed. He knew he wasn’t cut out for this.

Numer refused to giv- No, wait, he’s going back home. No, wait, he’s coming ba- No, he’s giving up aga… No, wait, he’s decided, he’s not giving up! (At least not this early in the story!)

Numer held up the mallet, his arm shaking. Hoping the mallet wasn’t backwards again, he shot it at the tree. The energy shot flew into the tree, and… a mess of feathers fell out. A small bird flew out the tree, squawking. “Oops! Uh, sorr… uh…” Why was he talking to an animal? It couldn’t understand him.

Numer sighed. This was harder than he’d have hoped. All he could think to do was try climbing the tree again. Over and over, each time he just slid down the trunk to the ground.

Rolling over onto his back, Numer groaned. He hit the tree with the mallet a few times in desperation.

The crystal fell out and hit him on his good eye.

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