New Short Story! Liquid Melancholy

It’s time for a scaaaary story and–what? Halloween is over? Oh, so it is. Well, it’s not actually scary. Unless you count depression and loneliness to be scary. So… it’s scary.

Liquid Melancholy is a return to some old frenemies and wait that’s how you spell frenemy? I mean, it’s in spellchecker and that’s how you spell it?? But friend has an I before E except after C and oh never mind.

Liquid Melancholy heads back to Mintop to see how Conrad the Conqueror is doing. He has plans, but who cares about him we’re focusing on the magma monster here! Nobody ever visits the magma monster, and that has made Cagnorm lonely. They want a friend. Will they find it? To what lengths will they go to find one? That’s what this story looks at. Hope you like it!

This month’s new profile is… a rerun?? How about just some end-of-year plans instead?

Okay so this is hilarious and dumb. This month I was going to post a new species profile for Help Blocks. They’re not really a species but as a special type of robot I figured I would detail them. After I put it up for Patreon–$3+ patrons get to read those things early–I realized… I already had a profile page up for them! Somehow I’d missed that and typed them in as still needing one! I didn’t realize this until after writing a new one, but the new one was better so I put that up, so it’s still new in a way! (That said, it appears to have not been added to the Species page, so… what am I even doing????? Did I never make it public? Did I just not add it to that page? My head hurts. Moving on.)

So anyway you might be wondering why the font is different. WELL. WordPress used to not carry the font over from word documents, where I copy chapters and stories from, but it did take other formatting such as italics. Well now it takes the font, so either I have to start using the font I use in word documents (Corbel) or remove the font every time I post a new chapter. So this is my way of saying, hey, guess what, you’re going to start reading everything in Corbel! Uh, let me know if it’s worse. It seems kind of thinner, but that might be because it’s sans-serif, and I’ve read that it’s easier to read sans-serif on computer screens than serif anyway. Maybe at some point I’ll get around to updating older pages with the font change, and I really should because it’ll look bad being different at places, I wonder actually if there’s a way to just set it to automatically make everything the same font, in fact let me look right now… Okay it looks like there might be but it doesn’t have Corbel so bleah. To do so otherwise might be to dig through code and let me be honest I would rather brute force it than mess with code. My head hurts enough as it is.

SO. ANYWAY. I said I was going to discuss plans for the rest of the year! November 1st is not a new Wandering Fortunes chapter, but instead I’ll be posting a new short story! We’ll be visit some old friends, or enemies, or acquaintances, or something. It’s sad and lonely and lava. Should be fun! Then, in December, an intermission for Wandering Fortunes. It’s not a full chapter, and in fact it’s really short, so the end of the year might be a bit light on content, but on the flipside I’m hoping to have another one of those Top! Interruptus! scene thingies. The Wandering Fortunes intermission will actually go up on Patreon November 1st, a month early–with this, I’m going to start putting chapters up a full month early instead of half a month, so patrons get an even better bonus! (I’m also considering rearranging some rewards, but more on that when I get to it.)

Anyway, that’s about that. Might also have a small chance of a preview for another project before the year’s end, but honestly, don’t hold your breath, it’s had quite a few snags along the way–but I’m really hoping to have at least a preview by February, the one-year anniversary of Darmenzi‘s full release…

April Fool’s!

If you read my new story to the end, you saw this coming. Not a joke, not a prank, but an entire story that, for the most part, really is in the style that the joke claims to be in. Take that, fake movie trailers! I’m making REAL stuff for April Fool’s Day!

But…

The real April Fool’s is that it turns out the next few Wandering Fortunes chapters actually DO take something of a dark turn! Oh boy! Keep an eye around here, we’ll return to that story at the start of May.

For now, today’s Odemon will be coming shortly.

New short story! A holiday classic! Holy text of the Archussip religion! What?

A brand-new short story has gone up for the holiday season! In chapter 7 of Wandering Fortunes, the religion of Archussip was mentioned and talked about. This is the holy text of that religion. It is a moral-addled story of why you should obey the invisible pony sky god, Gourd, and why They are so great and why science is so bad? And also, Hollywood?

I wouldn’t call it a mess, per se… I’d call it a religious text. Archussipism is a religion rivaling that of, say, Scientology, or Mormonism, or… Catholicism.

feel free to tell me what you think!!

Coming October 13th!

In a little over a week I will post here on this site the first fully-public Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos short story. Here have a teaser:

 

He was once the greatest fighter the world that he had known had ever known…

Respected by his peers, feared by his challengers… He was on top of the world. No one could topple him.

But all that changed when she showed up. He was beaten, and he lost everything. Except his home. And his friends. And those things that are required to stay alive such as food and air. But he definitely lost his confidence and his talent. No more was he on top of the world; now he was nothing, nobody nowhere, nohow, ‘no’ why? ‘Cause he lost.

But now he risks losing everything that he didn’t lose when he lost everything unless he can find his lost confidence and talent and save the orphanage his home…

“THIS STORY ISN’T NEARLY AS DEEP AND SUBSTANTIAL AS YOU’RE MAKING IT OUT TO BE. IT’S ACTUALLY QUITE SHORT AND SILLY.”

Shut it up, you.

“WHY DON’T YOU COME OVER HERE AND MAKE ME?”

… Touché, buddy.

 

COMING OCTOBER THIRTEENTH: “Tough as Blades